FAMILY IT! — Wednesday Family Devotional — “Gentle in Our Time”

“And so I insist—and God backs me up on this—that there be no going along with the crowd, the empty-headed, mindless crowd. They’ve refused for so long to deal with God that they’ve lost touch not only with God but with reality itself. But that’s no life for you. You learned Christ!”  (Ephesians 4:17-18.20 The Message)

I love reading Paul’s letters!  In this section of his letter to the church in Ephesus he starts channeling his mother: “If everybody else jumped off the Empire State Building, would you?”  Tell me that doesn’t bring back memories for some of you.  (Maybe even recent memories.)  Paul’s reminding us that as we learn to walk with and live like Christ, our lives start to change.  We do things differently than we used to.  We act differently, think differently, treat people differently—we’re different from the way we used to be and from a lot of the people, “the crowd” around us.  

Have you noticed that?  Can you remember back to life before you and your family were centering your lives around Jesus?  Or maybe you’ve noticed some changes just since we’ve been in this series on gentleness. It may not be a giant difference, but my guess is you’ve seen something.  

Take a minute to think about it, then share one way you or your family is different from the crowd.

One of the cool things about living life with Jesus is that He keeps changing things.  Bit by bit, step by step, He transforms us and our families.  That’s pretty cool, because even if you don’t see big differences now, you know it’s coming.  

But what I’ve noticed through the years is that one of the hardest areas to change is our speech.  The words we use and the meaning behind them sound a lot like the crowd.  Rude comments, biting sarcasm, spiteful comebacks, ignorant remarks, “white” lies, foul language—it’s all a part of the world around us.  It’s like the crowd language.  And, for a lot of us, it’s our language, too.  Maybe it’s only when you’re at school, or just at practice.  Maybe it’s how we talk at work.  Maybe it’s how your whole family talks, to each other and to everyone else.  It’s easy to lose our sensitivity to what we’re saying because it seems like it’s how everybody talks.

Here’s the problem: speaking in that way, with those words and that attitude, betrays the mission of Christ.  Think about it—can you ever imagine Jesus talking like that?  Would He ever tell off Judas for betraying Him?  Would He tell Peter what a moron he was for not understanding a parable?  Would He make fun of the 5,000 people on the hillside because none of them brought lunch?  Would He bend the truth a bit and tell Pilate that He wasn’t the Son of God to get out of being beaten and crucified?

Easy answer.  No.  Not once.  Not even a little.  Jesus just wouldn’t do that.

Well…then neither should we.  Paul’s reminding our families that we need to be willing to be different from the crowd,  including our language.  Look what he writes a few verses later: “Watch the way you talk. Let nothing foul or dirty come out of your mouth. Say only what helps, each word a gift.”  (v 29)

Wow.  What if we made that our guide for the words we used: only say things that help?  What if our families made a pledge that each word out of our mouths would be a gift to the person we’re talking to?  It’d be different, that’s for sure!  But different in a totally awesome, building relationships, sounding like Jesus, changing the crowd kind of way, don’t you think?!  I mean, if we’re serious about being this gentle force in our community—neighborhood, classroom, board room, grocery store, etc—then it has to include our speech.  We’ve got to make sure our words are just as gentle as our actions and attitudes.

What changes do you need to make in your speech this week?  Is your family ready to take the 4:29 pledge?  Talk about it and come up with things you can do this week to make your words a blessing to those God brings around you.  Let’s let our language do some loving!